It took one phone call for him to tell me that he was in the middle of a divorce.It took only a few more conversations and rendezvous to cultivate a semi-serious relationship.This is one of the most common dilemmas my patients have brought to me over the past four decades.
Sometimes our relationships end abruptly through death or betrayal. Whatever the reason you find yourself single now, it’s important to heal and understand that it does take time for you to be ready to get involved with someone new. You sign up for an online dating site, hoping to find someone to ease the pain and help you move on.I was visiting my hometown for a weekend and he was visiting a local bar, thanks to the very persuasive powers of his friends and family.I was already a few drinks deep and he wasn’t far behind, but we struck up a conversation and danced like the drunken buffoons we were and, at the end of the night, exchanged numbers.You had too much going on during your divorce to possibly consider dating. This same script, I’m reminded, played out in the life of one of my favorite clients who fell in love with a separated man.Therefore, you seem to think all men should feel the same way. But you are correct in proceeding with a sense of caution. Not because he listed himself as divorced but is really separated. He gave a lot to her during their time together, but, when it got right down to it, he really needed to sow his oats for awhile.Even though his marriage was nearing its end and he was no longer love with his estranged wife, he would always love her.